6 Comments

It may be that our job is to change the world, "to do our best to ensure that as few as possible of the people being born every second have to endure more than they can bear". But despite the material gains of the last 500 years, I'm not persuaded that the existential tragic suffering of people overall has been reduced. The weight of living, regardless of one's material conditions, crushes many, and the circumstances the enable one person to transcend while another succumbs are beyond my understanding. But each of has the capacity to have a huge impact, for good or ill, on those we come in contact with. I don't believe that we (whoever "we" encompasses) can change the world, but we can each improve the lives of those we come into contact with in limitless ways and sometime those effects can ripple far beyond what we might've hoped or imagined. Too often, through history, those who were on a mission to make the world a better place caused as much suffering as they reduced. The imp on my shoulder is named Hubris, and he tugs on my ear and whispers whenever I'm getting above myself, "It's the person in front of you right now who deserves the best of you. Don't forget." We respond to depictions of tragedy in the arts the way we do because they ring so true. And despite all of that, time and time again, everywhere we turn, people find it within themselves to be kind and generous and loving and even noble in astonishing ways. It doesn't change the world. It's just moments of goodness. That's all we get. So cherish it.

Expand full comment
author

Thanks for your thoughtful and articulate reply T. Scott. While I find those recent material gains more significant than you do, I agree that they don't in themselves fix depression, angst, jealousy, or a million other things that come with the territory of being human. And when it comes to *how* to make the world a better place, I couldn't agree more. The people who actually improve our planet are those who bring a compassionate spirit to bear on concrete problems right in front of them that they have the motivation and skills to do something about. Large-scale efforts to Save the World as a Whole are less on the compassionate side of things and more one the power-trip social engineering side: look at all these people studying in charter schools because I like charter schools, look at all these people set to colonise Mars because I think rockets are cool. It's back to that famous quote about the ocean being made up of drops.

Expand full comment
Mar 18, 2023Liked by Wabi Sabi

Hopelessness is the root of inability to overcome adversities in my opinion, I never thought that I would be a sober person but here I am, 2 years sober. It was because I was fortunate enough to have people in my life that believed that I could get better even when I didn't believe that myself. I still have a bunch of flaws, knowing about them still hasn't helped me be better yet but I hope someday that changes too, I too feel like I'm more like Padraic, have no clue how to let go..

Nihilism may make sense but when you're alive, your own experience matters to you at the very least?

Expand full comment
author

Good to see you again Vin, and congratulations again, that's fantastic. Having people around you that believe in you is the best, you can't beat it.

I think all of us are like Padraic in many ways. That's why Aristotle was so on point when he said that tragic heroes are relatable. At times in my life I've been the Colm, at other times the Padraic - that's what makes it such a good film!

I believe that life has no meaning that can be easily articulated in words - which makes the nihilists' claim credible on the surface - but then again, nothing important can be articulated in words. As you say, experience matters because it matters because it matters. Life's suffused with beauty, meaning and wonder, because it just is. As Alan Watts says, the meaning of life is just to be alive.

Expand full comment

Very good essay! The conclusion is also something I reached recently: just like the abolitionists dealt with slavery, we need a similar movement to deal with suffering. Speaking of the abolitionists they certainly had fixed ideas: I don't know that they could have succeeded if they didn't, and I don't know that the Buddhists could have abolished slavery, which is a real flaw in Buddhism and Eastern religions generally. There are times that call for swimming with the current, and times that call for the opposite, time for chill, and time for no-chill: there is no final answer.

The Banshees of Inisherin seems to have an effect similar to The Dress picture of yore: some people sympathize more with Padraic, some more with Colm. I'm in Padraic's camp, because I don't think someone should just be allowed to walk away from a friendship like that, so this was certainly an interesting perspective.

> Neediness is inherently self-defeating because wanting something from the Other prevents you from encountering them as Other.

Very revealing, that's some good writing! But fretting about whether you are or are not encountering Others as Others seems like the road to neurosis, at least for me. Radical Honesty cult leader Brad Blanton has this exercise where you just go DUH DUH DUH, because that's basically the best attitude to take to life, according to him. I think there's wisdom in that, at least some of the time.

Expand full comment
author

Thanks Carlos! I think that's why Buddhism so often goes the apophatic route: not that, not the other, not both, not neither. It's impossible to sum truth up in words - the minute you establish a rule like "no fixed ideas" the rule itself becomes a fixed idea. 'There is no final answer' indeed, certainly not one that can be expressed in a sentence or a blog post.

I pretty consciously went hard on Padraic in the essay to serve my point - I sympathised with him when watching the movie more than the post might suggest. Plus I share all the flaws I see in both him and Colm to an extent, which is what makes tragedy so compelling. But I do think that a friend should be allowed to "break up with" another friend, and wish society viewed it the same way we view breaking off romantic entanglements.

Expand full comment